Things That Make Me Furrow My Brows

This is going to sound like somewhat of a hypocritical post, but stay with me here....

Unfortunately, we seem to be almost constantly immersed in a polluted sea of negativity - from people we know, strangers, advertisements, news reports, basically any and every form of media, especially social vehicles like Facebook and Twitter.
Now, don't get me wrong. I probably laughed as hard, if not harder than you when Jimmy Kimmel aired several videos of famous people reading hateful tweets sent to them by random strangers. It was hilarious.
The golden cupcake rule here is that they were making light of a negative situation, and that is exactly what we, as a society, have to do. It isn't just the media and people around us who are oozing with pessimism; it has now infiltrated......ourselves!!! *Gasp
Girls: How many times have you been perusing the "Women's Fashion" board on Pinterest, seen an adorable yet edgy and trendy outfit and thought, 'I love that....but I'd never have the guts to wear it, because it would look stupid on me.' ??
That's that little hate demon gnawing away at your core.
Alright, maybe it's not that dramatic, but you get the point I'm trying to make. If we're constantly bombarding ourselves with negative thoughts and emotions, then all that can ever be projected in each of our seemingly separate worlds is Negative Nancy to the max and all over the place. :o
Being negative and/or positive is a choice. I know people who can have magic rainbows kissing their face all day long only to complain about the wonder. You know, "looking a gift horse in the mouth" - which by the way, I've been trying to explain to my husband for about 5 years now. "No, I don't really know where it comes from or what a 'gift horse' is. No, I don't want to Google it. Yes, I know what it means, and you obviously don't."
Anyway, I digress.
These kinds of people willingly seek out negativity, which is a waste of energy in itself. Things piss me off, too, man, but you have to pick your battles. Is it really that bad?
Like in relationships. When you have an argument, you have to stop and ask yourselves, 'Is it a deal breaker?" Because if it's not, drop it and move on. It's not worth feeding into unnecessary negativity that will undoubtedly penetrate you, everyone, and everything else around you until it's unleashed in an all encompassing blanket of lower frequencies of hate.
..........
......
...
Heavy.

So here's a list of things that used to make me angry, but now I try to merely furrow my brow at for a split second. That doesn't count, right?



1)Anything that requires washing by hand
2)FB drama
3)Camo
4)Guys who wear shorts in the winter
5)Sorority/Fraternity logo overload
6)Decked out for 8 AM zoology
7)Dudes who wear desperate shirts, i.e. arrows pointing to your crotch, and any and all sexual inuendos.
8)Old ladies at the pharmacy who never cease to cut in front of me. Nice burn, ladies. Touché.
9)Customer service robots instead of people
10)Grocery sackers insisting on carrying out my 2 bags
11)The "white/not Hispanic" box on basically any form
12)Allsups' bathrooms
13)Guys who wear white sunglasses
14)When I call someone and hear Verizon's default ringback
15)Croc's
16)Wearing tights as pants. Seriously, camel toe?
17)When someone knows the lanes are merging yet continues to Ferrari it right to the end and then demand someone let them in. F you, dude. I'm not letting you in, and I will actively encourage others to make you wait as well. Momma didn't raise no fool.
18)When I have to pay extra for hot sauce.
19)Sauerkraut


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Concert Advice (How to Rock Out Not Included)

My sister and I are the radest.
A stranger once told us that we were being "kinda loud" at a rock concert.
Was she joking? Was she lost?
At the time, we were astounded, and although she wasn't very rude, we were offended (and a little inebriated). I mean, we were at a rock concert! I didn't even think inhibitions were allowed in, but it got me thinking about manners and behavior in such an emotionally and creatively fueled space. My sister and I have been avid concert goers for many, many moons now and consider ourselves quite seasoned and experienced in the arena.

Since my sister and I are quite the concert connoisseurs, I thought I'd hit you with a little concert advice. 

Leave the heels at home.
I shouldn't have to explain this, but unless you'll be sitting in a seat the entire show, rock the Keds.
Also, don't wear bras that fasten in the front. A venue I frequent routinely administers frisks complete with a front bra pop. Learned that the hard way.

Ladies: Invest in a cute concert purse. Anything in your back pockets can and will take a nasty toilet dive. I don't care how drunk you are, sticking your hand in there is something you'll never fully recover from.
Cell phones, driver's licence, credit cards, debit cards, cash, cigarettes, lighters, ticket stubs...hell, I even lost two rings that way. Even if you don't have any of the ol' witch's brew, your chances of sacrificing something to the toilet gods are way too high for my liking.
 - And as always, flush with your shoe.

Guys: While I respect your display of freedom, it isn't always imperative for you to remove your shirt.

If you're worried about holding, don't. Someone else always is. Yay! New friend for you!

Buy two drinks at a time. Holding them both is a whole lot less annoying than missing half of the show because you're stuck in the never-ending line of people loudly recounting every other concert they've seen. If it's a Summer show at an outside venue, get ready for some stinky, sweat swappin'. Rubbing sweaty arms with people for 20 minutes at a time is less than appetizing to say the least.


Take napkins from the bar. You'll need these about halfway through the night when every stall has been raped of toilet paper. (Most of it's on the floor.)


The perfect time for crowd surfing is like planetary alignment. We're talking ideal conditions here; pay close attention to the crowd's behavior. People infused with alcohol and emotion can easily develop into a raging mosh pit-
and why not? I love a good pit, but I also know when I need to get the hell out of the way. They may not WANT to inflict pain upon you, but it still happens nonetheless.
It's like a hardcore hug. 'I'm happy to be here! I'm happy that you're happy to be here, too!' It's fucking liberating.
The point is to choose the correct social weather; blissful rage does not always equate to your safe surf.

I've seen legs and arms broken, bloody noses, and lots of kicks in the head....
which brings me to my next piece of advice:
If you're like me, you've gotta feel the pure energy of the pit. Always give in to this, but always guard your head like a mofo. If you hear "flyer!" or "surfer!" at any point, get those forearms up and ready to protect and assist.

Autographs and pictures are obviously more of a possibility at smaller venues; however, I saw Elton John once in a large arena, and he signed autographs for the entire first row. Again, it all depends on the atmosphere and conditions. If you see a window, go for it. Be polite, gracious, and understanding if they can't/won't.  At the very least, you had the balls to speak.

And of course, always be respectful of your fellow concert rats.

If you get beer spilled on you, don't lose your shit. It's no big deal.

If you get thrown up on, lose your shit. It's totally a big deal.